One Armed Carrot Jokes

Who doesn’t want a little AliSUN in their day?


Anyone who doesn’t read this blog, apparently.

I ran to the soothing sounds of having New Moon read to me. Finally someone who reads TO ME!

New Moon - Visitor

I set out to run 5 miles and was back in about 40 minutes. I was ready to be done running but not ready to head back inside yet so I hopped on my bike for a 20 minute cool down ride and took advantage of the opportunity for a slightly longer work out today.

Home in time to be joined by a one armed carrot for lunch.

One Armed Carrot

What do you call an elephant with a carrot stuffed in each ear?

Anything you want, he can’t hear you!

I’m sorry. I googled one armed carrot jokes but I got nothing.

Google Carrot Jokes

At least the next person who googles “One Armed Carrot Jokes” should wind up here. Too bad I’ve got nothing. FOOLED YOU!

(If you are reading this post because you googled one armed carrot jokes, please report back with any good one armed carrot jokes you come up with so I’ve got one for next time.)

Moving on.

After listening to the sound of a one armed carrot clapping I enjoyed a giant salad and sound of Jillan yelling.


Oh Jillian how I’ve missed you!

The phone rang tonight during bathtime and it was Zachary Green Juice Lover calling to report his motorcycle was out of juice and he needed to be rescued. I pulled my two prunes out of the tub and off we went on a rescue mission.


Can you make out Zak in that pic? Are you making out with my husband?? *slap slap slap*

Words from the Weeds on the car ride to save dad?

Ava: Look! A wishing star! I wish I was a princess who never burped or farted! Isn’t that a good wish, mom?

Why yes, that is a good wish. I can’t say I haven’t wished that one myself. For both of us.

After rescuing the man I rescued the leftovers. Can we say bean soup and hummus? I think I just did.

Post Rescue Meal

Do you like that bite missing from the hummus on Ezekiel toast? Are you admiring how perfect my bite is? Two years of orthodontia baby! All leading up to this moment. You can thank my mom and dad in the comments for that.

It’s late and I’m feeling punchy (in case you couldn’t tell) from googling one armed carrot jokes and rescuing men and leftovers and wishing I was burpless fart free princess. I’m wishing that for you tonight too. You’re welcome.


It’s Juice Day

When I first started to consider vegetable juicing, Zak was skeptical. He didn’t understand what the point was or what was so great about it.

“Why not just eat a salad?” he asked.

Well sure, you could just eat a salad, but you’d have to eat A LOT of salad to reap all the benefits from the live enzymes and chlorophyll you get from a small glass of green juice. Or a big glass for that matter.

I was holding off buying a juicer because I felt some resistance and was not yet prepared to shell out big bucks on an experiment, but thank the heavens the juice gods smiled at us and the rest is history.

This same man that was so skeptical is now a green juice addict. He said yesterday he needs to know what the juice schedule is. I don’t think he cares so much about the health benefits of fresh vegetable juice as he does about the taste. And I’ll admit, it is way tastier and refreshing than I ever expected – thus we are still drinking it regularly nearly two months later.

How about every other day, does that work? We had juice on Wednesday, so that means today is juice day. I think we’ve got ourselves a schedule.

Zak left early to swim laps while I puttered around the quiet house and lugged the juicer out around 6:30.

It's Juice Day

Oh how I love the grinding sounds of a juicer in the morning.

My usual: a head of romaine, 1 cucumber, 2 apples, 2 lemons and a couple inches of ginger. Enough juice for two.

It's Juice Day

I’m a lean green juice drinking machine!

Lean Green Juice Drinking Machine

The girls are with Ellen today per our usual Friday routine. I’ve got a laundry list of things to do and am hoping for an uber productive child free day.

I waited to go for my run, it’s so chilly in the mornings I decided to work through my usual AM run time and hold off until this afternoon when it’s a bit warmer. I love my early morning runs but with a good 6 months of cold mornings in front of me, I’m going to take advantage of the warmer running while I can.

This morning’s fuel was delivered via a bowl of chocolate banana fruit cereal goodness.

Friday Fruit Cereal

2 diced small-ish bananas, tossed in ground flax seed and unsweetened cocoa powder. Topped with sliced almonds and a spoonful of almond butter and a pour of unsweetened chocolate almond milk. Talk about dessert for breakfast. This my favorite fruit cereal combo yet, thus why I’ve eaten this exact combo over and over again.

The skies are looking kind of dark, looks like I better get my sneaks on and head out the door before my warm afternoon run turns into a wet one!

Half Brained Half Marathon

I’ve felt so swamped this week I keep *forgetting* that the half marathon is on Sunday. Last year at this time I was gearing up to run my first full marathon and it was of course all I could think about. I began checking the weather forecast day 10 days out. I laid out my clothes and mixed and matched outfit possibilities in my mind figuring out what would work best. I checked the race website for updates multiple times a day. Re-read emails from the race director again and again, making sure I knew every last detail and didn’t miss a thing.

I was thinking about this today during my morning run and realized that oh yeah, the half marathon is just 3 days away! Sure, it’s only half the distance I ran last year but sometimes I need to pinch that soft fleshy skin under my arm between my elbow and my arm pit to make sure this is me who’s out there running most mornings. I think back to the person I use to believe I was. I was that girl who said I could never be a runner. Running hurts. It’s bad for my knees. My boobs are too big, I might give myself a black eye.

The right goal and some determination can do amazing things. Running’s a great way to lose weight? Hmmm, ok, maybe I’ll try it. I needed a goal and tried to train for the full marathon in 2007 but had no idea of the commitment, dedication and conditioning it took to run 26.2 miles. I told myself I just wasn’t built to go long distances. Some people can do it and some people can’t. I guess I’m one of those who can’t.

It’s funny the things we tell ourselves and believe to be true. These words and phrases we use to define ourselves and how it can hold us back from our full potential. Running is my personal example but it could be anything. Painting. Yoga. Underwater Basket Weaving. If you want it, reach for it.

After my 4.76 mile run this morning I wanted overnight oats so I reached for them. It’s been a while since I’ve had oats and I was in the mood yesterday so I knew overnight oat prep was in order last night.

Oats for breakfast makes me want to reach for coffee! But oh yeah, I’m not drinking coffee right now. If I dig a little deeper it’s not that I want coffee, I just want something warm to drink with oats.

Tea it is!

Honey Vanilla White Tea Chai

Oats, ground flax and unsweetened shredded coconut soaked overnight in unsweetened vanilla hemp milk, some mashed banana and a scoop of almond butter.

Overnight Oats

Topped this morning with sliced banana. I sweetened my chai tea with a tsp of agave nectar and a splash of 1% milk. Funny that I don’t need sugar in coffee but I do need something to sweeten my tea a little bit.

Thoughtfulness from a morning run aside, I’m suddenly excited that the half marathon is so close! I’ve got to go pick up my race packet tomorrow and start thinking about how I’m going to fuel up for the big day.

If the sky were the limit, what would you reach for? Be it big or small – what would it be? What’s your first step?

I want to be tidier! I want tidiness to come naturally and just be a part of my day to day life like running now is. I believe that with tidiness comes order and with order comes peace. My first step? I need to get rid of STUFF! Clutter! Papers! Magazines! Books! Can’t I just go run and forget about this mess I call a desk?

Oh yeah. That’s exactly what I’ve been doing. Interesting. I guess running and a clean desk aren’t compatible. Awww crap there I go with the definitions again.

And We’re Back!

I didn’t know if I was going to blog tonight but after a weekend away at the family cottage, completely removed from all forms of technology, the girls are making up for lost time and reacquainting themselves with their forgotten friends, Computer and Television. I like to call those friends Peace and Quiet, respectively.

A little photo journal from our weekend away. We had picture perfect weather and lots of uninterrupted family time.

Nature Pics


The exact same picture, but behind my sunglasses. Because I’m cool like that.

Same picture, behind sunglasses


Blue Flowers Fire!

Saturday was a rest day but I enjoyed a little unofficial exercise in the kayak. Holy shoulder work out batman.

In the Kayak

Yes, it’s really me behind the camera!

Yes, it's really me!



I see… a bad moon rising! There’s a bathroom on the right… or whatever the lyrics are to that song.

Moon Rise Over the River

Food Pics

Have veggies, will travel.

Have Veggies, Will Travel

I put together a couple of these little trail mix containers for easy snacking and packing. This was my pre-run snack this morning. Dried apples, raisins, walnuts and pumpkin seeds.

Happy Trails

I love to run at the cottage because the change of scenery is a great way to mix it up. Plus the area is hillier than an SOB and is another great way to mix it up. The hills also give me a great chance to try out new curse words too.

Kids Pics

This would be Ava’s new favorite thing: being buried to her neck in sand.

Ava's New Favorite Thing

Rinsing off and Zak showing Ava he can float.

He Can Float

And of course she had to be buried again this morning before we left.

Again Today

This concludes tonight’s photo adventure. Back to regularly scheduled blogging tomorrow AM!

No Rest for the Weary

Today is a rest day. I swapped exercise this morning with work on my never ending to-do list. Over the years I’ve signed myself to volunteer for various non-profit groups and organizations – all in my quest to keep my brain from turning to mush as a stay at home mom. It’s all good, but sometimes things pile up and out of no where I realize I’ve got a million of things to do when all I’d really like to do is curl up into the fetal position with Halloween costume catalog and pretend my biggest concern is what Disney Princess I want to be for Halloween.

Disney Princess Costumes

Between tasks this morning I’ve of course been in and out of the kitchen about half a dozen times already.

Garbonzo beans soaked for about 8 hours and cooked for an hour ready to meet their food processor maker. My guess is hummus will be made. And that’s a pretty good guess considering I’m the cook around here.


Magenta Lemonade, his and hers.

Magenta Lemonade for Two

Who says you can’t make lemonade from romaine, cucumbers, apples, beets, lemons and ginger? Not Natalia, that’s for sure.

More work at my desk, I swapped out my coffee break for a cantaloupe break.


Somehow I’m still finding time to slowly but surely work my way through Thrive. I’m feeling naturally drawn to only juice and fruit until lunch time lately. I have to say the things Brendan Brazier has to say about raw foods and a vegan lifestyle are pretty convincing. I love so much of what I read in the Raw Foods Detox Diet by Natalia Rose, Thrive has felt like a natural progression. It’s the athlete’s raw food bible in my mind. He gives such a great explanation as to why raw foods are so good for you and what they can do for your body. It’s hard to argue with what he writes. He’s filled in some of the gaps from Natalia’s book. I feel like I’m putting together the pieces of the puzzle for the perfect diet for me, grabbing a little from here, a little from there coming up with what works for me on both a nutritional level and an emotional/psychological level as well. It trickles down to the kids and Zak, even my friends and family who seem interested and will listen to me rattle on. Not to mention you fine people too! That’s what this is really all about though, right? Sharing what we learn and live with the people we love.

I’m going to write a real review on Thrive as soon as I finish it. I’m aiming for some time before I’ve got to make my final decision on being Ariel or Cinderella for Halloween. Here’s hoping.

To Do Lists

Maxine woke me up in the middle of the night last night to accompany her on a trip to the bathroom and for some water.  Instead of falling back to sleep after I got back into bed, I laid awake for well over an hour while my mind went around and around with all the things that have been accumulating on my mental to-do list.

I remembered something I heard Jillian Michaels talk about on her radio show once, that when she can’t sleep she gets up and writes down everything she has to do and then she feels like once it’s written down, she can rest.

Normally a to-do list in my head is all I need, but sometimes it does get too long and I start to feel overwhelmed, so writing it all down can be one way to alleviate some stress. Around 4am I finally got up and put it all on paper, scribbling every task and item that came to mind – even down to the most mundane things like “fold laundry”.

And it worked! I fell back to sleep almost immediately and then next thing I knew it was 8:45! It helped knowing my morning work out has been pushed back to later in the day when my mom comes out to visit with the girls this afternoon.

First thing on my to do list for today?


I’m down to my last two cucumbers from the garden. Being the last two, they are of course the black sheep of cucumbers.

Meet Shorty and his brother Albino.

Black Sheep Cucumbers

Fortunately their stature and color of their skin make no difference to me or the juicer.

Monday Green Juice

Today’s juice contained romaine, cucumbers, an apple, a lemon and some ginger.

We’ve got a couple things going on after lunch but have the morning free to play and work on this to-do list of mine.

Got any good tips or tricks for falling back to sleep?

Friday Funk

I don’t know whose brilliant idea it was that I get up 5am this morning but I have been walking around feeling like a zombie all day today. I. Am. Tired. I’d love to take a nap but I think at this point I’ve crossed the line from “taking a nap” to just “going to bed”. Do I know how to have a rockin’ good time on a Friday night or what?

For lunch I reheated some lasagna. That’s it. No salad, no side of steamed veggies. Just lasagna.

Just Lasagna

I finished up some things around here and then decided to eschew yoga this afternoon in favor of an impromptu shopping trip. I did that “swipe the debit card” pose. You know the one.

I was starving when I got home and dove promptly into the bag of carrots.


That carrot + about five others. I’d wished it was a piece of cake slathered with frosting but alas, it was just a carrot. Gotta love those didn’t-get-enough-sleep sugar cravings.

So it was just me and my carrot. I did however remember dark chocolate a short while later. Chocolate makes me happy. The fact that it was the end of the bar is the only reason that wasn’t a picture of 24 squares instead of just 6.

Chocolate makes me happy

And for dinner tonight? Hold on to your hats.


I feel like that I’m in one of those a bad commercials for Healthy Choice frozen dinners and I’m them chick who says “I had popcorn for dinner last night” and the other chick smirks and rattles on about her fabulous sounding Healthy Choice meal. What a bitch.

Why aren’t these kids tired yet? Don’t they know it’s 6:30? Why isn’t Zak home from work yet? Doesn’t he know it’s 6:30? Why aren’t I in bed yet? Look at the time! It’s 6:30!

Hurry home honey! It’s popcorn for dinner tonight!